I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize
