I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
he laminated a picture of his dick.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
