waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
