So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Randomize
