I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
