wrigley field is MILF paradise
he puts the penis in happiness.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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