she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
