Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
