I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
