He passed out mid-signature
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize