just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize