forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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