...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
