The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
The struggles of a small town man whore
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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