Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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