Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
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