could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
