I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
