at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
