hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
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