mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize