Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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