Texts From Last Night

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  (323): View more from California

  are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions

  (310): View more from California

  i wish

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  (323): are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions (310): i wish http://tfl.nu/mg2v
  Replies (6) Good night (804) Bad night (2809)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.

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  (772): I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring. http://tfl.nu/9i68
  Replies (10) Good night (2239) Bad night (790)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes

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  (412): i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes http://tfl.nu/hjgx
  Replies (55) Good night (718) Bad night (5727)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.

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  (828): So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me. http://tfl.nu/t0l7
  Replies (24) Good night (1500) Bad night (3863)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth

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  (619): I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth http://tfl.nu/3dui
  Replies (15) Good night (2796) Bad night (2361)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"

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  (408): you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later" http://tfl.nu/6byl
  Replies (14) Good night (7484) Bad night (1049)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.

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  (613): Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B. http://tfl.nu/8gac
  Replies (22) Good night (1045) Bad night (6057)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.

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  (301): If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich. http://tfl.nu/u48k
  Replies (6) Good night (2883) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.

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  (773): Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight. http://tfl.nu/f50l
  Replies (5) Good night (4272) Bad night (761)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning

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  (519): we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning http://tfl.nu/bwa3
  Replies (9) Good night (4103) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.

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  (607): Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair. http://tfl.nu/k6ce
  Replies (4) Good night (684) Bad night (938)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm at about main and main street

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  (630): I'm at about main and main street http://tfl.nu/my9q
  Replies (7) Good night (1753) Bad night (816)
• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.

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  (951): I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement. http://tfl.nu/1khp
  Replies (2) Good night (1336) Bad night (478)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  The family next to you was not pleased

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  (919): I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box. (1-919): The family next to you was not pleased http://tfl.nu/vcup
  Replies (8) Good night (363) Bad night (565)
• Favorite

  (324): View more from

  Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.

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  (324): Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first. http://tfl.nu/wosq
  Replies (1) Good night (444) Bad night (171)

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