you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
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