I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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