its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
