it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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