they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Randomize