my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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