are you so shy because you have an std?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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