Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
So vagazzling was a success
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
