When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
