great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
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From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
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Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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