he shaved USA in his pubs
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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