I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
