she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
