He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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