You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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