Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod