Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
