Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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