Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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