No awkward lesbian experiences without me
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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