Dual....:-)
I am puke
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
