Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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