You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
