Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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