Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
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