How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Randomize
