O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
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