I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
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so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
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Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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